The Pregnancy Test.
Mood:  celebratory
Topic: Pregnancy
Is. Negative!

Mommy: *still has no period and wonders WTF*

Daddy: *is relieved that he won't be the father of an 18-year-old at age 67*

Mommy: *may be menopausal, in which case buh-bye, AF!*

Sam & Matt: *have no idea*

Erika: *is grossed out that pregnancy is even an option, because that means we have been having sex, ewwww*

You: *should probably be grossed out too*

Mommy: *brought kimchee and miso soup for lunch, so is definitely turning Japanese and, apparently, Korean*

This story: *is over*