You Picked A Winner.
Mood:  incredulous
Why is it that men think they're invisible when they're in their cars? News Flash: Men, when you are driving and picking your noses, people can totally see you.

We've all observed it; but yesterday, I got stuck behind the king-hell nose-picking driver of all time. People, this guy was on fire.

He dug and dug. After each dig, he cocked back his hand and admired what he'd retrieved, then he reached in to dig some more. He switched from his right hand to his left and back again, searching for that perfect angle.

All this time, he was drifting along at 30 mph in a 45 mph zone. No way was this guy going to let mere driving interfere with his nose-picking. Traffic was streaming past us at breakneck speed, so I couldn't pass. I was his captive audience.

Then he got the rearview involved. He craned his neck back and kept mining, navigating with the rearview. Had he been using the rearview to look at something other than the inside of his nose, he could have seen me behind him, giving him the stink-eye and also making gagging faces. But no, this guy was involved. By this time, he was starting to thrash around a bit, twisting in his seat at an odd angle. I wanted to tell him and his nose, Y'all get a room already, will you? But he wouldn't have heard. You know, the nose thing.

Finally I got past him, turning to get a look at what sort of person would pick his nose with such feverish intensity. I was reminded of a story from Ben's college days, when he and a carload of buddies passed a guy who, despite having his wife and kids in the car, was picking his nose and driving. When they passed him, they honked the horn, and the guy whirled around to see the entire carload of smartasses waving and picking their noses. I was tempted to do that, but refrained.

Because I know it wouldn't have helped. You can't stop a guy on a quest, even (especially?) a quest for that One Perfect Booger.