Ivory-Billed Woodpecker In My Backyard!
Mood:  special
Topic: Geekery
I lie, of course. God, I lie. This is not the ivory-bill, as anyone can tell from the lack of white feathers on the wing edges. This is the pileated woodpecker, its close cousin.

Pronunciation was an issue, so I went searching once and for all for the proper way to say pileated; is it pill-ee-ated or pile-ee-ated? Apparently both are considered proper, but I found a webpage featuring a Poindexter with binoculars around his neck who held that according to the rules of pronunciation, it had to be pile-ee-ated; if it were pill-ee-ated, it would have to have two Ls.

I related this to Ben. "What about depilatory?" he asked immediately. I stared at him. (Prick.) "Well, this guy's a bird geek, not a grammarian," I replied. "But I'm going with pile-ee-ated."

Immediately after taking this picture, some disaster involving the boys pulled me into the house, and when I looked back out the window, my pileated friend had fallen from the jade tree, which is located near the feeders, to the ground. Dashing outside to rescue it, I told this to Ben, and we looked at each other and said simultaneously, One of them must have tried to fuck it.

My woodpecker's virtue was intact, I think, but it sure is fun being married to someone who thinks exactly the same way you do.