Wow, Check Out That Uterus Externus.
Mood:  incredulous
Topic: Geekery
(This is not a large, dead spider cuddled alongside my glasses and latte mug. If this were a large, dead spider, I would have screamed very loudly, broken both the glasses and the mug through leaping gracelessly out of my seat, and certainly would not have taken the time for a photograph. Furthermore, God, does my desk need refinishing.)

Have you ever found yourself in the middle of doing something, humming tunelessly and puttering along, only to suddenly realize that what you are doing is something most people would find extremely odd?

For the past half-hour -- that is, beginning at approximately 4:45 a.m. on a Wednesday, while it is still dark outside -- I have been poring over the newly molted exoskeleton of my Mexican Red-Knee, examining abdomen and chelicerae in an effort to, well, sex my spider. In this regard I've been perusing texts crammed with helpful advice like The chelicerae of females are larger, wider and more robust than in males. (Breene, College of the Southwest, Carlsbad, NM.) There is a scientist in Atlanta who will sex your tarantula for free if you mail him a fresh exoskeleton treated with alcohol, but honestly? I just haven't the energy.

Arachne is really only a baby yet, a birthday present last Halloween weekend. So, hard to tell much in terms of the spermathecae. I'm going to go with the chelicerae and pronounce her still a female. She sure is a bitch; then again, if I'd just lain on my back for eight solid hours and then crawled clean out of my skin, I'd probably be surly too.

Speaking of surly, it's getting light outside. And now back to our regularly scheduled weekday routine. Have a good day, stay in your skin if you can, and mind those chelicerae.